Fame at last!

www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m0001x37

If you click on the link and go 54 mins in you will hear me tell the story of things my mum made me do! It’s a funny story honest, although my mum might not my agree if she ever hears it!

My brother says I started off with my telephone voice and ended up sounding like Catherine Tates nan! You folk from far flung places might have to google her to see!!

I’m full of the cold but still managing to do 2 of the 3 resolutions I made. Mel Robbins #MindsetReset which it’s not too late to do btw brilliant. She goes on a bit but it’s worth it. And yoga with adriene! Love that woman it’s really helped with this rotten cold I’ve got, all that breathing! I signed up for a maths course on furture learn to help my son, but after the first video it became apparent it was too far advanced , I’m still at 1 and1 is 2 level. So he is on his own I’m afraid.

One of the things Mel Robbins suggests is not to sleep by your phone, so for the first time in years I put the phone in the next room and didn’t check it first thing. Quite enlightening actually! I even did the washing up which is a first in the morning!

Reading a fabulous book With the end in mind by Kathryn Mannix she is a palliative care dr and her experience and stories are beautifully written with compassion and encourages us to look ahead as we will all die one day so let’s make it less frightening, honestly it’s really good. Bit heavy maybe! Anyway off to work with a positive mind set and a snotty nose.

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It’s a new dawn, it’s a new day!! And I feel good!!

So we have made it over to the next year!!

Rather than make up resolutions I’ve decided to do 3 30 day challenges in January. First one is #MindsetReset by Mel Robbins, the author of the 5 second rule or as I call her, the 54321 lady with nice hair and an old face! Love her! It’s basically assessing your life and working on 6 key areas, body, work, love life, self worth, friendships I’ve just realised I’ve forgotten to do the other one! I’m not sure what it is so that’s your cue to check it out!!

The other challenge is Dedicate, a yoga with adriene, she does one every January and boy ! She is fab especially if you have never done yoga before, she really explains each move so well that you know it’s safe to do at home alone!! No tying your legs round your head nonsense! Both of these are available on YouTube.

I’ve actually just signed up for sally Wilkinson’s free step challenge too, You can find her on Facebook Get Over Yourself Get Fitter!

So there really is loads to get you through the next few gloomy months till the snow comes in March and my new granddaughter will be making her way into this wonderful sometimes terrible, world!

My 2 year af anniversary will be 11th February so that keeps my mind focussed on other things! Determined to start in a positive way this year.

Have a journey to India to look forward to( using the term loosely now after I found 2 people were killed by being bitten by monkeys at the place we are going to do conservation work!) I’m also trying not to dwell on the fact that the last few days of our trip will be in Delhi during Diwali, apparently the firecrackers that are set off during this religious festival lasting 5 days make the city the worlds most toxic air!! Oh and yesterday my mum helpful told me a friend of hers got amoebic dysentery when she went there, then tried to lessen the blow by saying her travelling companion didn’t get it!! If me and my friend make it back intact and still speaking I will consider it a great success!!

2018! What a year!!

As I approach the 2nd year anniversary of being AF, I have found myself in reflective mood!! Interestingly, the urge to have a wee Prosecco has been quite strong this year, taking me quite by surprise but with a collective No! From my adult kids when I even suggested it, I made do with loads of Christmas pudding with brandy in it instead! Did the trick.

This Christmas has been the most laid back and wonderful Christmas ever. We did a 20 quid secret Santa so no one spent a fortune and we all had fun picking daft pressies. And as my son was working all afternoon at a local hotel we had all day to cook dinner. I did the whole thing, which if you knew me, was indeed a miracle as I don’t cook! Nothing burnt except a few Brussels ! We ate at about 7.30!! Perfect.

Having 8 people over to stay was not without its challenges, notably the fact that we only have one loo, and that gets blocked so often my husband has invested in industrial unblocking rods and can often be seen outside our house down the manhole up to his eyes in shite! This has been going on for sometime and rather than seek outside help, which would cost, he soldiers on himself! His last idea to avert the inevitable blocked loo was to invest in a bum gun, apparently they are all the rage in Asia, according to my daughter who has travelled. Apparently the blocking issue is due to toilet paper, I did point out you still have to dry your bum after gunning it so paper would still be required!

I had an idea which I thought could solve the problem, hire a Portaloo only 100 for two weeks! We could disguise it as a Tardis and the neighbours would be non the wiser! Husband vetoed that saying it was a ridiculous idea and completely unnecessary. When a friend offered a camping Portaloo for free suddenly it was the best idea ever!

The only person to use it was my daughters boyfriend who we were meeting for the first time on Christmas Day, obviously nervous and with a cleaning obsession, being forced to pee in a shed and then realise it doesn’t flush was one way of breaking the ice!! He must really like her!!

My younger daughter is heavy with child!!! Yes at long last I’m going to be a Grandma!!!! She met her now fiancé in may! There 7th date was the 12 week scan!! But they are so happy and loved up and excited who cares that he is from NZ and they will probably end up living there! Apparently it’s on the other side of the world!!

So it’s been quite a year but I have lovely memories and non of the guilt and paranoia that Christmas used to bring! Don’t get me wrong hubby and I have had a few dodgy moments this year and it’s a miracle we are still together but crisis seem to pass by much quicker now we are AF.

Happy New Year when it comes !

Hot Mikado

Just call me Katisha! I’ve spent the last week in a leopard print catsuit with red wig,a whip and a feather boa strutting round the stage for my local am dram production of Hot Mikado! It’s been terrifying exciting and a bit of a shambles all at once ,but what fun!

Being sober has helped me be fully present for the whole process, really challenging myself to get out of my comfort zone! It’s 293 days since I drank . Can’t quite believe it! Life has changed drastically and mostly for the better. I was at an after show party tonight and I didn’t even think about drinking it was great. Had a laugh and a sing and came home fairly early. Love being in control of myself, I have had some real ups and downs but on the whole life is settling down nicely! Probably very boring but am passed caring what others thing. I’ve been reading a book called The Four Agreements, trying to live by them, they are

1. Be impeccable with your word, to yourself and others

2. Don’t take anything personally , good or bad

3. Don’t make assumptions!

4. Always do your best.

Following these to the best of your ability is all you can do to live a good life! Any comments??

Long time no post! 262 days !

The irony of writing a blog about abstaining from alcohol is that the more af days you get,the less need or urge to post.  However it seems to me that this is when I probably should be posting! Not to boast about how well I’m doing….although I seem to be! But because it’s good for newbies to know that life goes on and is so much better than I have ever known. Now I’m saying that laid up in bed with a virus and no voice! 3 weeks before I am supposed to play Katisha in our local am dram production of Hot Mikado! 

So what’s changed?  One of the things I’ve been working on is my mind body and spirit! Without getting too hippy about it all I have joined a 28 day accountability group on Facebook led by a woman called Sally Wilkinson. If you have never heard of her, check her Facebook page which is called Get over yourself get fitter! She is inspirational and hilarious, from the North of England she calls herself the Northern Knobhead.  She is a fitness instructor and is big into mental health and well being. Her video s that she posts are amazing and funny. She does her HIIT training sessions in her kitchen and cries when her back goes which it does from time to time. I was lucky enough to get into her first group of 60 women who all wanted a kick up the backside to exercise and feel good about ourselves. It was very emotional to support and receive support from a group of likeminded people who all ages shapes and sizes pushed themselves to do things they would not have done. Basically there is a list we wrote which included compulsory daily elements and our own personalised goals. We coloured in the list as we did or did not achieve these goals, the aim was progress not perfection. My list included daily meditation, hula hooping, journaling, drinking 2l h2o a day and not interrupting as well as the compulsory goals of HIIT/ planking / tricep dips.  Now any one could write and do a list of these things but being part of a group that had daily 6am live videos to watch Sally make us laugh and give us motivational readings each day was amazing. She is doing another course 6th November which is full and is planning a monthly subscription and website in the new year. So keep your eyes peeled !!

Being sober this year has enabled me to be able to support my adult daughters after events in their lives meant they needed to come home. It’s been a truly wonderful summer having them home and completely unexpected as they left 10 years ago. They will be moving out soon but hopefully not as far away as they had been. I have been able to help them by bein present and at the same time giving them the space the need to work things through

Hubby is AF too and his life has changed even more than mine, he lost over 1 stone and is happiest I’ve known him. So life is good, I’m till an outsider but at least I’m a sober one!!!

Positive thinking!

I’m reading a book called “positive thinking ” by Gill Hasson. What I like about it is its simplicity and how the exercises in it are straightforward and relevant to everyone’s life! I’ve bought myself a journal A4 in size and a beautifully decorated cover to encourage me to use it. So I’ve set about a few goals I want to achieve, how I’m going to do achieve them, these include eating more healthily, by including more water fruit and veg and cutting back on sugar, eating protein with each meal and really making each meal as attractive to look at as possible, not shovelling it down my gob at a rate of knots but actually taking my time. This is one of 4 goals, the others relate to a specific job I’d like to go for, travel and decorating!!! Quite a range to start with!

Part of the book that I felt has been really useful to me is how to deal with disappointment. For example last year I did a degree course after years of not studying that related to my job. I loved the course and felt I tried really hard. I passed but my grade for my essay was not as good as I had hoped and it made me feel like a failure. I’d wanted to go on to do a masters programme, but because of this I felt I wouldn’t be up to it. One of the things in the book that has helped me change my mind is that, although I’m acknowledging that I didn’t do as well as I’d hoped, I had passed! And rather than deter me it should spur me on. Reflecting on what I could of done better, for example asking for help and not procrastinating and taking the comments from my essay and really examining what I could improve on has made me think…sod it im going to give it a go! 

I also need to examine my motives, for example I’ve always had a chip on my shoulder about being a bit thick, hence all the courses I’ve done to try and disprove this. So I really need to look at what I’m setting out to achieve, who it’s benefitting and if it’s necessary, or I’ll be doing courses till I’m on my deathbed and still feel like I’m thick as a brick. Anyhow I’d recommend this book to anyone like me who likes a no nonsense practical approach to how to put positive thinking into your life. That’s my book review over!

Today it’s midway through the second week of my holiday, and this part is spent at home, I have been really blessed with the good weather and the sun is shining brightly, I’m off for a run , then going to potter about the garden today!! The simple things are sometimes the best!! Day 151 alcohol free!!

Alcohol free holiday!!

So, not only did I have a wonderful week in Cornwall with my family,both hubby and I stayed alcohol free.  We ran every day visited lots of lovely places, went on long coastal walks and spent time with the children , eating out at lovely restaurants and playing daft games. We even went on a ghost walk around st Ives! 

Now this is in complete contrast to our last family holiday when we went to Spain, where hangovers ruled the day and we did diddly squat all day trying to recover to start all over again!

Now I’m not saying we weren’t tempted, but the fact that we have put in place strategies to deal with this after having a few months af , such as alcohol free wine and beer helped, although we didn’t have these a lot, as I don’t think it’s helpful to use these too often, in this case they were useful when others were drinking for example when we went for a meal. However , hubby and I have decided to not waste our money on these but get used to soft drinks or a cup of tea! Both of us are now able to play it forward, where we imagine the consequences of drinking, how it would end. Also I’m 150 days and hubby 90 and the fact that I’m “winning” for change is incentive enough for me!